sunnuntai 16. lokakuuta 2016

Elegia engl. käännös

Lisäsin tuohon käännökseeni ajatusviivoja, jottei vanhuuden taitavuus tulisi sotketuksi elämän vaikeuksiin.

http://einoleinopoems.blogspot.fi


Elegia

"Left behind is youth - like a flowing river.
Already grey threads - sets life's golden handiwork.
I reach for the present moment -
life's joy does not come from pleasant company or wine.

Left behind in time - my strenght's proud days.
The love of my spirit - in ancient times.
I rose from the pit. - I doubt I can fall again?
The wish of all: painless moments.

We know: peace in the grave is allowed us.
Seeker does not find comforting rest,
cool wind speaks, sun is obstructed from sight by storm,
a red line is left: a forceless longing for beauty.

Drown in the sea - my dreams' hills in flower.
I am a poor man: expensive are the costs of songs.
I gave my all, I had the forces to be active - for a while,
the loves f my dreams I paid by my mind's sorrow.

I am exhausted - oh, to the roots of my heart!
Was I given too much - life's load?
Or am I one of those wo have the will but not strenght?
My victory - empty, the results of my work - my conscience finds fault in them.

So in the end - were without a good reason born, difficulties,
broken chains - burned, loved ships?
Now already did I fall - when my all was needed?
I was solidified to ice - when my wound got a scar?

Hopeless fight - against heaven's powers!
Kannel sings - song does not comfort it's child.
Frost night speaks - tune sings - with collapsing wings.
To the peace of my pit - like a dying beast I sneak.


Eino Leino   ( My nonliteral translation)



This poem is a favourite of the elderly and they copy a lot from it, I think, since in Finnish it is very impressive, song like. I added the "-" lines to make it more understandable. I did not like the fact that while reaching for secrecy it mixes the skills brought by experience with things going poorly It is fact that most people have great potential and sometimes hardships make a break in the habits and give us a rise toward higher talent if just the advices are right. But on the other hand it aren't good to give an impression that great skill due to experience and reaching for good quality, would somehow usually connect to great misfortune. I guess that some of the typical errors of the lderly come from this poem, so I replaced "In vain, in vain, I grasp the moment" by "I reach for the present moment" which is a cure and not the problem like the first one: one should not let good years pass one by without living them."

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